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Stop Victim Blaming

ASHLEY CARINO 🌻
3 min readFeb 13, 2022

Why do we blame the victim instead of the perpetrator?

Image By: https://www.istockphoto.com

I recently commented on a story about a mom leaving her kids in the car to run into the store during a snowstorm at 7 pm. She left the car on and went in and when she came out someone stole her car with her two kids inside. People were commenting on the post calling it negligent and saying she should go to jail for child negligence. Now hear me out. What she did was not ok, but I took the time to put myself in that moms’ shoes. Thankfully the kids were found safe. One child was found barefoot on a sidewalk and the one-year-old was found in her stolen car. This mom was frantic and called the police immediately. I got my head chewed off for commenting to stop victim-blaming because we don’t know what mom’s situation is.

I thought back to when I was a single mom and had my baby. When my son got sick late at night, I didn’t have anywhere to leave him so I would have to take him with me to the pharmacy or WaWa to get what they need. Do you take the kids inside in below freezing weather to go into the store quickly ideally? Sometimes you’re in such a rush you just go get what you need and come out. I’m sure this mom wasn’t thinking oh let me purposefully leave my kids alone in the car so some idiot would take them. People love to deflect on the situation and the problem, and it's that those two kids and a car was stolen.

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ASHLEY CARINO 🌻
ASHLEY CARINO 🌻

Written by ASHLEY CARINO 🌻

Life Style & Mental Health Writer. I love to read and write. I’ll follow back!

Responses (8)

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Try to put yourself in their shoes before commenting hate.

I think this is partly because everyone is trying to empathize with the victim. No one puts himself in the place of the perpetrator, but everyone puts himself in the place of the victim and tries to find the reason for the incident with a BIG confirmation bias.

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You are absolutely right! Let's stop blaming the victim.
Great story.

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I live in Canada, and this is common practice especially in freezing weather. That's too bad she's getting judged.

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